smile-

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Guilt so strong, so dense, it beleaguers you with complexity. It comes knocking on your door just when you think it has subsided. Will it ever leave? You question.
You can remonstrance and demur, but no definite answer will be found. You can only wait optimistically.

You try to run, but you lack the strength. You try to hide, but you lack the heart.
Now, it leaves you prostrate. You smile, but as a masquerade of solace.

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9:31 PM

Monday, May 14, 2007

is love omnipotent, or does it have to face up to reality too? what do u think?
life's tough.

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9:02 PM

Monday, January 22, 2007

from time to time.

i just wanted to say that ive not been talking to this friend for very long. the lack of communication may have created misunderstandings deep enough for me to cast a truckload of unsupported aspersions on him. i may be guilty of that.
the cordial conversations aside, its time to engage in some decent heart-to-heart talk. lets hit the drinks and have a talk soon.

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11:27 PM

Sunday, December 17, 2006

still on holiday! will be back on the 22nd. i'll update (no promises) when im back (:

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11:57 AM

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

holidays (:

through my dogged efforts, i have overcome all odds - procrastination & technical difficulties - to update a decent (hopefully) entry here. you know what they say about holidays?

we have nothing, but time.

precisely. i can afford to be profligate and let time slowly slip off my hands, yet not view it as some form of cardinal sin. the contrast is glaring when i juxtaposed the current scenario with the pre-Os period, albeit positively.
in retrospect, that period of assiduous studying has been enriching; many friends were made and priceless moments kept. back then, even an afternoon nap will be reprimanded with digust from my subconscious self,

'Os are so near, u still have the audacity to waste time?'

in a matter of months, the situation has pirouetted and taken a massive change. i love holidays, simply because time is not an issue; i have plenty of that. there is only one thing i should take note of - practise abstemious drinking, lest i suffer from liver damage. haha.

i have been chilling and on the lookout for sirenic places. im still searching for the perfect chill-out place, but for now, i rate ann siang as my favourite rendezvous. seriously need to gather some homies to enjoy a night-out there, soon.

i will be leaving singapore this friday, travelling alone. hahaha, its going to be a sensational experience. will try to do another entry before i bid u guys farewell.

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1:00 PM

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

forget me not.

i suppose i can afford a truce from the books and do a quick update over here. Os officially starts tmr (malayan history). this is vexing but well, i can draw comfort from the fact that it will all be over in 2 weeks.

17 nov shall mark the start of my extensive tomfoolery; i promise i'll play so hard.

apologies to all my beloved friends whom ive been neglecting during this period of time. you guys have always been in my mind- seriously.
we've got lots of catching up to do after my much-loathed Os!
miss u ppl (jonas,pop,willy,joey, russ, abbs,david,claire,steph,aunty sherli!)
lots of love,
teckyang (:

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12:55 PM

Sunday, September 24, 2006

on the border of philosophising.

I suppose the closure of prelim has successfully carved out an aqueduct for my creative juices to flow again; since I can afford some time to luxuriate in my musing and exercise a portion of catharsis.

I have engaged myself in deep cognitive sessions for the past few days, replacing my short hiatus from books for the bipolar strife of reasoning and reputing - all these hype for my attempt on deriving at a suitable definition of life.

I wouldn't deny that my definition is still in the process of undergoing refinement, but as of now, I will write about the thoughts generated thus far. When I receive new revelations - coupled with the right mood and inclinations - I will write again.

I believe life takes on an undulating form; akin to the ebbing of the waves. Needless to say, there is bound to be successive crests and troughs - very much in correspondence with life. Life is capable in taking on different permutations; a moment ago one may be all gleeful, but the next moment nauseatingly suicidal.
The next time u visit the beach, do observe the ebbing of the waves; the transition of high tide to low is often unpredictable and catches you off-guard.

I observed, and found it to be surrealistically interlinked with life. The unpredictability of life has thrust me into a mental imbroglio - one from the metaphysical realm. What exactly is life to me? I have read this phrase somewhere before, and I reckon it best represents what I am thinking.

To live and to let live.

To live-
First and foremost, one must live a life free from the vice-liked grips of Regret. This is a common killer which has gone scot-free since the beginning of time. It is time to eliminate this adversary with the fiery bat of courage before it gets detrimental and plague the generation to come.
haha, I am making it sound a tad too superlative.

'If only I studied harder. If only I controlled myself. If only.. if only..'

We often spend half of our time whining about issues that we could have averted. if only we took practical solutions to curb it..

Next, live a fulfilling life. Enjoy what you do, and do what you enjoy. If clubbing makes u feeling purposeful, club. If building up god's kingdom opens up the joy-door to your life, build. If studying gives u fulfilment, study.

Whatever you choose to do, do not let monotony creep in and suffocate, or blind u from having the life you could have. Be no deserter, soldier on in times of adversity and u will emerge the victor of your crusade.

To let live-
Your life far exceeds the boundary of me, myself and I. What a warped world it would have been if people tenaciously held on to this facade - the acme of selfishness. To me, one has to do life together with others, only then will one advance towards the creme-de-la-creme of life.
Lead people out of the alley of darkness and into the blissful horizon - lustrous and scintillated. It is always good to shed positive influence and see people around being metamorphosed.
I feel it is also imperative for one to have a close circle of friends, to impact, and be impacted.

Twenty years from now, it doesn't matter which profession we are in, what cars we drive, or the spouses we have, but it is the small and seemingly insignificant acts that will remain etched in our inmost depths.

The little gestures do matter; breathing life into others is no feat. I love you all my friends.
So, live and let live people.
Have a blessed weekend.

*I will write about some of the events/gatherings on my next entry.

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3:22 PM

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

sexy little night.

hello world! im in an exceptionally gd mood today! prelims are over!
im not looking forward to the collection of my resuls but well, lets take one step at a time.
for now, its time to relaxxxxxxxx.
im leaving the hse soon, night out with my homies at ecp! the night will be beautiful. will update again soon! (:

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9:55 PM

Monday, September 04, 2006

a diferent man.

his room was a kaleidoscope of love, passion and uncertainty. completed pieces of artwork varying in all sizes and outlook are strewn all over the floor - your typical devil-may-care guy. the air lingered of tobacco; it is a feat to dispel the odoriferous cloud for his cigarette was lited almost every other hour. in the corner of his room - better known as pigsty- thick drawing blocks were stacked up in the corner. i picked them up and casually browsed through, not forgetting to shower him with an avalanche of questions in the process.

his answers were brash; clearly, he was proud of bring an artist, or at least, an artist in the making. he continued to share with me some of his philsophical beliefs and regaled me with his entire repertoire of jokes. i have to admit, im very much enthralled by his idiosyncratic style of living.

there was a trance in the air, like time infinitely stopped in its tracks. there was a need to subdue the air of aloofness he carried, but then again, this characteristic labelled him with an
unique and peculiar identity. he gave the rat race a miss, and distanced himself from the frenetic candence of modern world society. seemingly, the world was at his disposal for he was caught in a timeless apathy and need not be accountable for things he does.

'is it possible to make it big by merely being an artist?' i questioned inquisitively. for a moment, i thought he would shoot me with a wry glance or scoffed at my candidness but he did none.
'life is an art. it is about doing things u enjoy.' he replied dismissively.

i left his place, convulsed with admiration - not worship though.

kudos to him for mustering the courage to carry out his passion and having the faith to trode on the path less taken.
this is ur gung-ho artist of tomorrow.

we shld all get a little apathetic and life might be better that way. ignorance/ignoring is bliss; providing an escapism from the screwed up world. it is about time i abort certain beliefs which i held dear to, because it is ravenously devouring me from the inside.
i can do with a little love from people whom i love.

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11:30 PM

Friday, September 01, 2006

pictures

dad has finally decided to banish the obsolete digicam - in use for circa 4yrs - for a new casio. i tested its prowess and it proves to be pretty impressive. i shall add a few photos up here before meeting up with the gang for some drinks. hmmmm...

will update again soon, hopefully. cheers (:

shit, blogger needs a major overhaul soon - the pics are taking forever to load. perhaps its abt time i switch over to livejournal.

sorry, just 2 pics for now.

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10:47 PM